Recently, I’ve been reflecting on what I’ve achieved this year. I still can’t believe that we’re over halfway through 2010, and that my goals sometimes feel within reach and sometimes feel a hundred miles away. I guess all actors/musicians end up feeling this way at various points throughout their working life – it’s not a stable career choice and certainly not for the financially timid. But despite that, this year I have had a deeper sense of fulfillment than I have in a long time; a sense that I am on the right path and that I just have to keep forging ahead and believing in myself.

It feels like the universe is testing my will – can I keep going for another day along the right path, even if it’s hard? There’s a phrase in the writings of my Buddhist practice that spurs me on at these times:

‘The journey from Kamakura to Kyoto takes twelve days. If you travel for eleven but stop with only one day remaining, how can you admire the moon over the capital?’
- Nichiren Daishonin

This quote always reminds me of why I need to always push forwards. My ‘moon over the capital’ is having a working life as an actor and musician, but for this to happen I’m always going to feel like I’m on the eleventh day – always striving to get the next gig, the next part. I choose take comfort and inspiration in this – life would be so very boring without impending financial doom around every corner, right? I think if I ever felt like I’d reached my Kyoto, I’d have to find a new journey to start. I am at my happiest when in a maelstrom – too busy with creative work to know when to sleep, constantly pushing myself to improve and setting myself new goals and challenges. The quiet life was not designed for me.

This weekend, I am travelling to Philadelphia to support behind the scenes at a huge culture festival. I see it as no coincidence that my role will be to support the performers at this event – an opportunity to create incredible fortune in my life by encouraging and helping other performers to inspire an arena of 10,000 youth, all hoping and working to make a change in the apathy and negativity that surrounds us in current society. It has taken over my life a bit in the last few months, and made it all the more challenging to fit in other things – work, acting, music, social life (ha ha). However, by challenging myself yet again to make it all happen, I know it can only lead to more benefit. In fact, I’ve already seen it both in my own attitude to my life and in sudden increased interest in my acting and musical talents (most notably Curb Your Enthusiasm, and my band being played on a podcast).

I guess what I’m saying is that so far, 2010 has been pretty awesome. I’d better make sure the rest of it doesn’t suck.

(Oh and P.S. If you’re under 35 and want to come to this festival, you too can feel awesome and inspired. Lemme know.)

Yesterday was a very good day. In the 6 months or so since I jacked in my day job and started this whole process of becoming a full-time arty farty type, I’ve made some fun indie films, spent two days in Albany shooting a crazy independent TV show and sleeping on the floor of the director’s house, sat in countless boring offices answering the phone for investment bankers and submitted god knows how many headshots and resumes for films. Yesterday, it felt like I was taking a good-sized step up the ladder.

I’ve been trying to get into background work since January – I’m registered with most agencies and submitted for plenty of calls. The only bite I got was on a day that I couldn’t work. However, after really determining to make a breakthrough with my career this week, I got a call out of the blue from the lovely folks at Grant Wifley Casting, calling me in for a day on Curb Your Enthusiasm which is filming in New York at the moment. I was super psyched to get on this show, which I find incredibly painful to watch but also hysterically funny.

After managing to get to a great audition in the morning (hurrah for a late call time) that also went extremely well, I got to set and after the usual waiting around was taken, with 250 or so other background, to the Lyceum Theatre on 46th Street where they were filming this scene. I was pretty surprised (and excited) to see Ricky Gervais up on stage, obviously rehearsing for the scene! This day is getting even better, I thought to myself.

The AD then scans the crowd and picks me out to come and sit where they are setting up all the cameras. Brilliant, I think. I’ll actually get a bit of screen time. I then realise they are keeping the three seats directly behind me empty, because those are the seats for Larry David, Susie Essman and Jeff Garlin.

Oh. Hell. Yes.

I spent the next four hours being annoyed at the three of them as they argued over which seat they were sitting in, and got to actually glare at Larry David as he bumped my seat switching places. Featured background credit? Oh, I think so.

The day was topped off by watching Ricky cackle his way through his takes, playing a pretentious version of himself as a Broadway actor, making Ruthie Henshall laugh (she was his co-star in the ‘play’) and thinking that it was the best day to have been called to set if you were English. To cap it all off, we wrapped two hours early so I was home by 10pm.

And that, dear readers, is a day that will never likely happen again. Most of the time background work is deathly dull, tiring and uncomfortable. I got paid to spend the evening acting with Larry David and Ricky Gervais, in an air-conditioned theatre sitting in a cushioned seat. Ah, the good life.