This time next week, I will be in the Caribbean. While this fills me with a sense of unbelievable excitement, each day between now and then is getting busier and busier with trying to get everything planned, ensure the budget is correct (which unfortunately it is…anyone got an extra gig we can play out there?), work out what I’m going to take with me, try and work as much as possible so I don’t go totally broke, see Vince’s show, go to band practice, fit in shifts at my Buddhist centre which has a huge meeting tonight, meet with my fellow theatre company producers to discuss the future of the company, oh and perhaps get some sleep in there somewhere.

I was working until 1am last night, and although I was annoyed that my 8.30am-6pm job today got cancelled, it was a blessing in disguise because I slept hard. I still feel like a zombie even though I’ve had two cups of tea and some food, so I hope I wake up a bit before I head out to support the meeting tonight.

Overshadowing all this, though, is a sense that these problems feel incredibly trivial in the grand scheme of things. I keep praying, keep hoping and keep moving forwards, knowing that my best offering to the world right now is my prayer and my belief in living life to its fullest. Me feeling miserable about the state of the planet does nothing to help, but sending positivity and hope into the universe will. So that’s what I will keep doing. Join me.

It’s been a rather strange weekend, all told. After I woke up on Friday and learned about the earthquake & tsunami in Japan, I really couldn’t focus on something specific to blog about, as it does sometimes feel rather trivial to talk about the gig you have the next day or how you’re looking forward to a lie in when there is so much devastation happening elsewhere. However, that is a fact of life every single day. I suppose that we feel more connected to disasters today, thanks to constant news updates and the internet and so on – when the volcano exploded on Krakatoa in 1883, causing such severe climate change that the temperature of the planet was changed for years, it barely made a news story back in Britain, and not until nearly six months later. Gives you a sense of how our world has changed.

I think that it has been a benefit to our shared humanity that we are so connected to people all over the world now. Although we can’t possibly each help with every single crisis or disaster going on every day, it does encourage us to think outside our own narrow definition of who we need to care about. We need to care about everyone. That doesn’t mean driving yourself mad with guilt about your privileged existence or trying to donate to every cause going, but it gives you the opportunity to learn more about the world and find your own small way to contribute to a better world. If everyone did that, imagine the possibilities.

So this weekend I went about my daily life – hosting the Pub Crawl, playing a fantastic gig with Coyote Love on Saturday night for Hank’s birthday, sleeping in on Sunday and finished doing my taxes with Vince – but tried to do my part by donating to the Red Cross’s appeal for Japan and continuing to chant for all the victims and survivors of the disaster. It’s a small contribution, no doubt, but if I made a small contribution, so did a lot of other people. It adds up, and it matters.

I often have moments of realisation that my life swings wildly and hilariously between extremes. One moment I’m standing on a film set feeling like I have the best life in the world, then the next day I am sitting at home with no work on the horizon and thinking up ways to combine rice, spaghetti sauce and leftover curry to make something for dinner without spending any money. Just take the last seven days as a good example.

Last Friday, I was sitting in the well-heeled offices of a private equity firm, dressed smartly and being an officious executive assistant. At 5pm, I revealed my alter-ego of Actor Rachel and ran uptown to an audition, changing into trendy jeans and boots along the way. The rest of the weekend I was Casual Rachel, having a great time catching up with friends.

Monday and Tuesday rolled around with no work, so I was Couch Potato Rachel, managing to get up and be productive but without spending money. I was also Byakuren Rachel on Monday night, supporting a wonderful cultural lecture at my Buddhist centre as a behind-the-scenes volunteer (our group is called Byakuren, which means white lotus).

By Wednesday, I was Crew Rachel, clad all in black with a work belt, wrenches, snips, knives and flashlights to set up lights for a party for rich people at a rich people’s private club. We got to use the service entrance a lot and wheel heavy bins with lights, booms and base plates around the expensive rugs and china, running hundreds of feet of electrical cable and trying not to electrocute myself on a crappy plug. Today, I am back as Executive Assistant Rachel, smartly dressed in an office and quite bored, as there is little to do here. Someone also forgot to tell the building that it is not summer yet, so the vents are blowing cold air on me and making me wish I’d worn trousers. This evening I’ll be Rockstar Rachel going to band practice.

My life is unintentionally hilarious and schizophrenic.

I was so happy to have a day off last week. Oh the joy. Oh how I waxed lyrical about it.

After my second day in a row of diligently getting up early, being ready to get a phone call to go to work and nothing coming, I’m less inclined to poetry and more to blasphemy. However, I remain aware of how lucky I am to be getting work at all, especially given that I’m still making ends meet and not going into debt, so I am off out to take a walk in the beautiful sunny, crisp air and not spend any money.

Enjoy your day!

I had an awesome weekend, one a little too busy to blog. On Friday after work, I legged it uptown to audition for two plays. Chris and Schnele, husband and wife team (and good friends of Vince and me), are directing the shows and I was really pleased to be asked to read for them; it’s been a good few months since I auditioned for anything and a REALLY long time since I did a theatre audition, and it felt good to prepare sides and dust off the cobwebs. After that, I had time to stop in for evening gongyo at my buddhist centre before heading out to Brooklyn to drink far too much wine and eat delicious Indian food made by my buddy Pete. Our favourite Canadian had come to see us for a couple of days so catching up all round was had until the wee hours. Vince and I then made the looooong trek home when everything was running local, but least we didn’t fall asleep and end up in Queens like we did once before.

After not quite enough sleep, Saturday rolled around and I went to meet Pete, Dawn & Julie. We strolled around in Coney Island for a bit (they had been to the Aquarium) before a quick stop back at Pete & Dawn’s house, then on to the city and dinner at Five Points.

Oh, Five Points. It’s some of the best food I have ever eaten. Julie made the reservation and made a note that I have to be gluten-free, so our waiter was incredibly helpful and careful with ensuring my food was safe as well as utterly delicious. It was a divine culinary experience.

Yet again, I did not have enough sleep before being up at 5.30 the next morning to support a couple of different meetings at my buddhist centre. What seemed like no time later, I scarfed a couple of bananas on the way to a special Pub Crawl that we were running for the members of the theatre company that the crawl supports. It was hilarious, particularly when one person on the tour bought all six of the guides a drink and when we expressed our appreciation, simply looked at me with one eyebrow raised and said ‘oh darling, don’t worry about it. I have more money than God.’ Hysterical.

By the time the tour was done and Julie & Dawn had come to meet us, I was barely standing upright. Jewls and I headed home and I managed to stay awake long enough to stuff my face with some delicious tacos that Vince made, and hang out with Julie a bit before the tiredness overtook and it was off to dreamtime.

I was sad to say goodbye to Julie this morning, but what a great weekend. She is like a sister to me, but an awesome nerd one that shares all my geek obsessions and a similar taste in clothes and music. When our little crew get together, it’s guaranteed to be far too much fun. This weekend didn’t disappoint.